Sunday, October 9, 2011

You are My Beauty Magazine

I keep running away from the blog.
Even now when I have decided to face it, it is only partial, my confrontation so happens to be in my second language, not my mother tongue. This can only mean there is a barrier between myself and I, not just a language one.
Days slip by....
I can't keep up with you!
And this is not the way I thought it would be.

I suddenly found myself in a battle that I have to win. A battle to decide who I want to be and what I want to do with my life. My life was never a battle and I hate this, I hate this and I am starting to believe I was never meant to do anything useful with my life.

Do I have to do my Masters?
Do I have to learn a third language?
Do I have to be involved in politics?
Do I have to have a cause that will make earth a better place if I fought hard enough?
Do I have to read multiple books by authors who introduced new ideas to the human race?

The pressure I have to face is like the pressure "shallower" women have to face to be "perfect" in beauty magazines' definition.

I feel pressured into having to be our first female president for you to like me and this is not fun.

This is very personal and you don't have the time to hear it from me.
So I put it on my blog, I put my emotions and fears for other people to read it.
I doubt you will have the time to read my blog.





3 comments:

  1. For me to like you Menna you don't have to be Egypt's first female president, you don't have to change the world or be anyone of great social stature. You just have to be yourself.
    What you wrote here is beautifully honest and quite brave, I always make time to read things like this.

    You've just won me over. :)

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  2. I always have time to read your blog =)

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  3. I read somewhere that we can't supersize our dreams for society. Maybe our dream is to be the girl next door and have a lot of free time in life to enjoy the little things. Why does that have to be so "unambitious"?

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